Mac Moments

My children are always surprising me, from little seemingly insignificant frames in our lives to those that inspire me to be better than what I am. Jessica has always been the child who has endured more obstacles in life than I could ever have foreseen one of my children having to deal with. As stroppy as she reacts to disappointments or criticism she makes up for in courage with grace. When she was a baby it was easier to hold her screaming body while the doctor suctioned her ears, injected antibiotics, readied her for her next operation or cracked her spine. My tears would be mixed with her sweat unaware of how tough and not so brave her Mommy was. Now it is different, now she sees the injections, now she is aware of the pain and most of all she can see the angst in my face and knows that I can understand every painful moment she has to undergo. Yet our little trooper faces her demons with a brave heart and soul and sometimes verbally wishes that her brother could just take one...

The decision to have another little person was a contentious issue between us. Steve was happy with just one, I wanted a second. Two reasons. Firstly, I think being an only child can be very lonely when you are young and as you grow older. Secondly, a palm reader had told me I would only have one child and that I would have two husbands. I did not like those odds, so I decided to change them. Our second little person came a lot sooner than we had anticipated. Sean had taken two years to conceive, we figured it would take as long, if not longer for a second little bundle to arrive. One month after deciding to begin the new adventure, I was pregnant. We were in SHOCK. 22 months between them was not what we had counted on. By the time I was ten days overdue, I was ready to take her out myself. Being induced was not fun and after initially rejecting the epidural, 6 hours later I was demanding the anesthetist's attention. As the hours passed, the Gynae insisted I have a C-sect...

I was certainly not ready for Father's Day this year. I thought it was on the 20th, which does not make sense, I promise I saw it written somewhere! By the time I realized that it was upon us already, City Center and Villagio were now shut down (due to the awful Fire tragedy) and Landmark was just a nightmare between parking and shoppers. I did not make it to buying anything, until the day of, knowing I could get in before the masses arrived.... With a bit of prompting the kids made cards, while in the morning I dashed downstairs and made Steve a cooked breakfast - he was surprised and loved the gesture, thank goodness. Dinner was a similar affair, with a beautifully laid table, fabulous food, dessert and company. It is the first year I feel like a really awful Mother/Wife for being so slack!! Father's Day is also Steve's Dads Birthday. It is a day of remembrance and reflection for him.  It is a day of mixed emotions.  It is now the first Father's Day that my Dad...

This past week has been a frenzy of doctor visits, hospital hallways, pills and just not feeling well.  I have spent many a day in doctors rooms and hospital hallways with Jessica and many more I am sure to come. Nine years ago, I was rocking her in my arms hoping that the doctor would come soon as her feed was growing closer and popping my boob out to feed her was not an option. Not that I wouldn't have done that if I could but Jess needed to be fed via a tube directly into her stomach, so it was a necessity to get home with our sterile equipment, the right formula and feeding kit. One visit we spent 5 hours waiting for the Pediatric surgeon to arrive (he patched mostly abused children back together, he was the best and we were prepared to wait), he needed to replace her tube. Jess was 3 months old, anyone who has had a baby knows 5 hours is an eternity, she was a saint. At one Jess could be entertained with a few toys and as she was not really mobile it was more a...